I Don't Want to Die Up Here

The Prince of Paper Mache and I have really taken this float business one step further. Realizing the muslin that will be covering the float will be adhered with spray adhesive, we began wondering if the thin layer of dust and dirt on top of the vehicle would hinder adhesion (is that a word?).

So, like any normal people would do, we scaled the front of the RV (see picture below). With a bucket, mop, and sponges, we scoured the top...and watched as the grime ran down the sides. Beautiful, now let's get down. Oh, wait, the RV is wet and slippery, and it looks very steep...and very scary.

And so we sat, looking down (I warned him not to use body language to suggest we were stuck...I DO NOT want the old lady across the street knowing we couldn't get down...I'm not sure why).

Plan A: Wait for my neighbor, Michael, to get home...he has a big ladder...but may torment us a bit first.

Plan B: The Prince of Paper Mache jumps off the side, then cushions my fall as I go down the front...no good...could mean a broken ankle for sure.

Plan C: He braces himself while sitting on top and I hold onto his arms/hands while scaling backwards off the front of the vehicle...we started that plan, and it went something like this..."No, I don't think I can do this...oh dear, it's so high...I can't do this" (that was me).

Plan D: Jump onto a tall red truck going by...but he didn't stop, and he didn't look the type to let our wet and dirty feet on his huge truck.

All these plans sucked.

So he modified a plan and went off the front backwards. I was braced, arms extended, ready to grab him if he started slipping. And then he had one of those moments you sometimes see when someone is scared of drowning, only to realize they're in 3 feet of water. He looked up and said, "Wow, that was really f*$%ing easy".

My turn. I turned around, started the descent (very nervous). I kept hearing the warnings/concerns of my boyfriend...he had predicted something like this might happen (after all, he knows both of us...he saw this coming).

I was scared as he coached me down (it's so clear to me that he has a daughter...very fatherly coaching, "It's ok, you're almost there"), he tapped on the bottom of my foot to show me how close I was. And I hit the hood...yes, very easy. Humiliatingly easy.

Despite it being easy, neither of us plan to ride on top of the float at the parade.