Thumb
By Carolyn's Sister, "T"
“No, I don’t want to go to sleep!” she cried. The she I’m talking about is my big sister Carolyn. As they do every Friday night, my parents are trying to get us to stay in bed so they can watch their weekly TV shows. As Carolyn and I try to hunker down, I can’t help but scooch over to her side. That’s just how I am; the cuddly type. Carolyn, on the other hand, likes her space! “Okay,” she says to me with a bit of frustration in her voice, here is the line. She draws an imaginary line down the center of the bed. “You can’t cross it!” Yeah right, I think to myself, that’s too good of a challenge to turn down. So, I do what every person in my situation does…I slowly, yes, very slowly scoot my body closer and closer to Carolyn. “Mom! She’s too close AND she’s sucking her thumb!” Oh great, another night of bliss is about to be destroyed by the bain of my short existence…Thumb!
In case you don’t know what I’m talking about, Thumb is this clear liquid that comes in a little glass jar. Yes, it all sounds very innocent. But just wait until you have to put it on your thumb and let it harden. It tastes like fingernail polish remover. So, as I’m laying there with this awful Thumb on my thumb, I’m thinking through every possible way to get rid of this stuff so I can suck my thumb again (let’s face it, at six years of age, there aren’t a whole lot of options. The idea to get out of bed and rinse my thumb off in the bathroom sink never crosses my mind).
As usual, Carolyn has no problems falling asleep. Before I know it, my thoughts of removing the Thumb are interrupted by a very familiar sound. I look over and gaze at Carolyn, and the slobbery, snoring monster she has now become. As if by magnetic force, my hand is drawn to the monster. Slowly but surely, my arm stretches out and crosses the imaginary center line. “Whew, no alarm went off,” I whisper to myself with a grin. The force continues to pull my arm toward it, and then lowers it toward its final destination…Carolyn’s mouth! In it goes, where it finally lands on her slippery, slimy tongue. Even though I am very grossed out, I remind myself what my ultimate goal is; to get my thumb safely back into MY mouth (minus the Thumb). A few more seconds of twisting and turning my now very moist thumb on Carolyn’s tongue, and that should do it, I think to myself thankfully. Great! Now it’s time to make the exit.
By now, Carolyn’s snoring has stopped and her body is slowly turning towards the outside of the bed. I pull my arm out and wipe my thumb off with my blanket. After all, I don’t need any slobber, just a Thumb free thumb. “Mission accomplished,” I whisper, while happily putting my thumb into my own mouth.
Carolyn didn’t realize a thing…so I thought! It turns out, the next morning when we woke up, Carolyn mentioned a really strange taste she had in her mouth. All I know is that I slept really well last night!
A Note From Carolyn: After reading this story again, I'm not sure I should have published it. I really don't sound all that cute as the slobbering monster.
3 Comments:
Another very entertaining story. Devising resourceful solutions to challenging problems obviously runs in your family.
You have NO idea! I haven't begun to write about my mother's solutions...she's the ring leader of us three girls.
I found this story hilarious and well written. Has anyone in your family written a book? Your sister, as a six year old, sounded pretty clever. I can't wait to hear about your mother.
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