Monday, May 22, 2006

More Trouble Than I Expected

Ok, so the roses being delivered was really funny for about 5 minutes.

Since then, I've set a professional boundary with the person that sent them, and have been deluged with creepy voicemails and calls to the front desk asking if I'm there (only to get mad and hang up when they've repeatedly told him I'm not in). Our agency security plan has been helpful, and my co-workers and volunteers have been tremendously supportive.

I really thought this would blow over quickly. I've never had anything this serious happen before, but it may actually be a good experience in the long-run. I had no idea I could feel this scared by someone. The most important thing in this whole situation is that I need to feel empowered, and not let this change living my life everyday. But it kind of is changing it...

I feel fear for the first time in quite a while. We're pretty sure it's only a matter of time before he shows up at the office. We have a plan for that, but my main concern is if he follows me home and figures out where I live. I feel safe with The Boyfriend following me to work and someone walking me down when I leave...but if he figures out where we live...that will REALLY put a damper on me feeling secure.

So, I feel really passive just waiting for him to spring up, but there is a certain chain of command...and "A" (my co-worker that's been handling everything and has been INVALUABLE) and I are chain of command followers.

At this point, after having to screen my calls and watching my back when in the reception area, I'd really like to just give him the big F%#* you. I hate being controlled by fear.
Fear is ugly.


Blogger Stephen (aka Q) said...

Yeah, that's a nasty situation. I'm sure it will all turn out OK, but your fear is understandable.

2:22 PM  

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